Da Vinci Code
I was having a conversation with a friend of mine when she mentioned the (in)famous Da Vinci Code, and inquired if I had ever read it. Well, I certainly have read it, and I made it clear that I didn’t think much of it.
That reminded me of the review I wrote on 17th October 2004 - a day after I compleated reading Dan Brown’s ‘novel’. I’ll post it here for those who are curious:
Its less than 24 hours since I completed reading Dan Brown’s novel, and I wanted to write what I thought of the book.
First things first. What is this book all about? The Da Vinci Code is a novel, and as novels go it should not be treated seriously. Unfortunetly, this book does something that most works of fiction rarely touch upon - the divinity of Jesus, the truth of the Holy Grail, and how Leonard Da Vinci supposedly hid codes in some of his great paintings - codes which would reveal the ultimate secret of Jesus. This secret, the novel claims, is something so powerful that the Catholic Church would do anything to stop it from being exposed. Okay, so after reading of such a plot, readers would forgive themselves for having bitten the bait and purchased it.
I am not a Christian. I do not claim to understand some of the Bibical references in the novel. I am no art historian either. I have always been intrigued by the enigma that is Leonardo and his work, but I know nothing more than the fact that Splinter (the rat in Ninja Turtles) admired him and named the eldest of the Turtles after him. Therefore, you won’t find me questioning Brown’s claims.
I do, however, read. And reading is something that I enjoy; something that I savour. A good book for me would leave a permenant imprint in my mind. When I pick a novel to read, I expect a few things - well rounded charachters, good diolouge, an original plot and most importantly I need great prose dammit.
Brown’s novel only gave me a plot. As I mentioned earlier, the plot is the very reason that I wanted to read it. The plot wis the very reason that I kept asking my friends if they had read it. The plot is the very reason that these same friends purchased the novel for themselves. And the plot is the reason that I almost purchased it myself. (Fortunetly, I didn’t. Thanks to Tweety for giving me a copy) The plot is the only reason I can attribute for the novel’s phenomenal sucess.
Hey Jesus wasn’t a divine entity, dude! I read this awesome novel from this Brown guy. And don’t even get me started on what the Mona Lisa is all about. You just have to read it.
Conspiracies have a way of enticing us to do stupid things, don’t they? Where am I going with this long diatribe? Hang on, I am getting to it.
Brown’s greatest skill is the same skill possessed by Sidney Sheldon, Daniel Steele, Barbara Taylor Bradford, James Patterson and hell even Mario Puzo (But he wrote the Godfather. He is forgiven). They have the ability to write tales are pre-concieved for the modern reader who has little time to waste on reading novels with grace, charm and are heavy. Instead we want something that is light, fast and is unputdownable (Cliche, I know) That is exactly what Brown has given us. Something that is fast and unputdownable.
From the moment I started this novel there were two voices in my head - one pushing me to get back to the novel; to hell with all the work that have piled up over the week. The other telling me that this was nothing more than pulp fiction, cleverly masking behind “impecable research”. Unfortunetly, the former won.
Brown’s charachters -Robert Langdon, Sophie Neveau, Sir Leigh Teabing, Silas and Bishop Aringarosa - are two dimensional and easily forgettable. Langdon likes nothing more than symbols so he could start off his various lecturtes. I call them ‘lectures’ because his diolouge throughout the novel resembles one - even when he is being chased by the French police and a mad monk. Neveau likes nothing better than cracking codes. Teabing, the most ridiculous charachter is also, strangely enough, the most colorful (What do you expect with a name like Teabing?) as he plots the downfall of the Catholic church - at least he gets the best diologue throughout (”Robert, you brought me a virgin?”, “If you step into my plane, inspector, my lawyers will have your testicles for breakfast”).
The Da Vinci Code is many things to many people. For me, it is a I will never read it again. For people who want a better plot, better writing, and a more unforgettable read, do yourselves a favour: seek out ‘Mission’ by Patrick Tilley. I believe that it is now out of print and very hard to get. I was lucky enough to find a copy in the local library. I know what I will be reading next. It won’t be any offering by Dan Brown.
